Its not like the movies

Friday 11 May at 1050 | Posted in Humour, Life, Lifestyle, London, Personal, Rants | 3 Comments

I rarely go to church. Infact only family can get me to go. I like my laugh the way it is, I don’t need to be told I’m going to Hell. I already know. But it would help my argument if I stayed away from churches.

The boy who likes to play Godfather 

Last weekend I went back to Runcorn for the Christening of my niece. Or step niece. Or half step niece. Either, Im a Godfather.

I didnt have to say much. Which was good as everytime I opened my mouth I seemed to offend the second Godfather sitting next to me.  Turns out he is a Christian. I wish I had known this earlier. That way I wouldnt of opened the hymn book at any page and I’d of not questioned the priest mentioning a sponsor during prayers. I thought this is a little unheard of. What do I know? This is just going to make it much harder for me at the Pearly Gates when my video tape is shown.
It didnt click until half way through the ceremony that all his singing was much more then just his happiness of being a chosen one for little Rose. But there were other factors in his singing.

He had to be a Christian.

I wish Christians could wear something to makle them stand out. It would help. Perhaps they could wear a “I hate Harry Hill” badge? That way we would all be able to tell. And it would cause me no embarrassment.

Other things I learnt while back home in Runcorn. Beer up there is far far cheaper to buy. Like a third of the price then down here. This doesnt mean that buying everyone you see a pint or two is a good idea, as youll end up just as skint.

But there isnt enough time to be skint. I’m off out to another new club. Buttoned Down Disco.
I know it says it’s a secret location, but if you want to go and cant get a email invite from joining their mailing list let me know and I’ll send you mine.



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  1. Maybe all Christians could wear those ‘Jesus is my Homeboy’ t shirts. But they may find that offensive.

    So you are someone’s spritual guardian, that child is so lucky. 😉

  2. I like Rebecca’s idea. I was asked to be a godmother and said I’d be delighted, so long as she was aware there’d be more gin than god in this godparent. She said she was fine with that.

    Thought i’d better check.

  3. Rebecca, lucky isnt the word Id use…haha

    LG,arent we all going to Hell anyway?

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